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Teen Angst: Love, Lovers, And Losing: True Love
Is It True Love?
There are many types of love, but many of them are not real or true.
So how do you tell if you're in really in love?
To understand what true love is, let's look at some of the ways that teens and adults love to see where you fit in.
1) The Other Person Completes You.
This type of love is called "in need" because you need the other person to be around to make you feel happy.
Unfortunately, being in need hurts.
Need makes you sit by the phone waiting. You can't eat or sleep unless the other person is with you. You need constant contact, like having that special person send text messages that they're thinking about you.
People in need write great love songs, and supply writers with characters for terrifying dramas, like Fatal Attraction.
If you're in need... do yourself a favor and take up a distracting hobby, or move on to look for real love.
2) The Other Person Is Giving You Something You Want.
You might be getting sexual favors, material objects, or attention, but the reality is, you're "in want"...not in love.
People who are in want often think that they're in love because someone has found them loveable enough to give them these favors.
And to be honest, it feels nice to be loveable and worthy.
But... if a person in need... hooks up with a person in want...you have a heck of a stormy combination where one will give till it hurts, and the other will take until the well dries up.
If you're in want, try wanting better for yourself because true love is about giving. Give youself the gift of a better, healthier, and stonger relationship.
3) The Other Person Gives You Confidence
Also known as a trophy relationship, this kind of love empowers you, so we'll say you're not quite in love but... inPOWered.
Trophies take a lot of energy to get, and are a lot of work to keep.
You might think it's worth having everyone know you date the star quarterback or the head cheerleader, but if you hate football it would feel like torture sitting through their games every weekend
If you're inPOWered by such shallow love, think how much you could gain in a real loving relationship. Put the trophy on the shelf, and set some new goals to inPower yourself.
4) You're Comfortable And The Other Person Is Just Okay
If you're just happy to not be alone, then you might be settling.
Being with someone because you'd rather not be alone can work for a while if you kinda like the person, but eventually all their endearing habits will make you sick to your stomach.
Get real, it's healthier.
How Will You Know When It's True Love?
True love feels great, and feels right.
When you're separated from someone you love, it's okay, because you have confidence that both of your feelings will still be the same regardless.
Plus, when two people in love want the same things, they're willing to work together to get them so, your resources and capabilities are as endless as your love.
And since you're relaxed and confident in your relationship, you won't need a trophy to enhance yourself, and while you might be settled you won't feel stuck.
This is true love, but understand that as you grow and experience life, your relationship will change.
If you both make adjustments as you grow, the relationship will flourish. If not, then it might be time to move on.
However, if you've taken the time to find and develop true love, you will both be able to let go...because you will both love and respect each other enough to let each other grow.
How Do You Look For Love?
Check out... Teen Angst: Love, Lovers, and Losing Hang Outs And Hook Ups
Meanwhile...Check This Out
Finding love is not as difficult, as it is for terris1958's graphic stick figure hero.
But... girls out there... do try to consider the feelings of boys.
It takes a lot of courage put your heart on the line and approach a girl, especially if she's with a group of friends.
If you're not interested be kind, don't laugh, don't point him out to your posse, and thank the guy for the complement because it really is a sincere and honest gesture.
Finding True Love by Terris1968